WeeeeEEEEEEeeeeee...BOOM.

That was the sound of me, crashing into bed last night. I usually put Blake to bed and then work or play or watch teevee until he wakes up again. Depending on how late his first wakeup occurs, I'll either go to bed myself or spend a few more minutes doing stuff. I time my own activities by his waking, which can get pretty hairy. There was one night last week when I put him down at 7:30 and he didn't wake up until 5 to midnight. I wondered why I was getting so tired, but it never occurred to me to check a clock...

Anyway, yesterday was Baby Club, so I got up with him at 7. (We know he's up for the day when he starts crawling all over me and saying "up! up!") Apparently my body wasn't ready for that new schedule, because I was unable to stay awake that night during Blake's bedtime ritual. The two of us crashed in the bed at 7:30. It seemed like a good idea at the time. Unfortunately, Blake was very restless all night long and I spent a long time awake in the middle of night as he crawled over and over me, looking for the magic nipple of lethe.

The really sad thing is that I was too tired to get up with him at 7 this morning, so the Boy had to do it again. He's really getting cranky with me (the Boy, that is) and I can understand why. It can't be fun to work the evening shift, fall into bed, then get up at the crack of dawn with a hungry, smelly baby who has more get-up-and-go than a hundred sleepy fathers. Unfortunately for the Boy, I am neither generous nor diplomatic when I haven't slept well. Grumpy like the bear, that's me.

Good news from Baby Club: I believe I've found a successor. Tanya, the mum of 3-month-old Bradon (who coincidentally is married to Big Unfriendly Morgan) may be interested in pursuing a career in midwifery and would like to immerse herself in women's experiences. I am so, so grateful to her for agreeing to take this on. She's a very good listener and more quiet than myself and the previous moderator, which I think is a welcome change. She & Laine & I have been meeting at Baby Club and going to lunch afterward for the past few weeks, and it's really rekindled my enthusiasm for the long commute now that the outdoor Organic Market is a cold cold gathering place.

Now I'm wondering if I should give her all the stuff I made for the group, which included posters, font packages, web documents, address lists - a fair lot of stuff, in other words. I don't want to scare her; I'm a bit of a handout queen and it looks like a lot to keep up even though it's not really. Besides, remember all the notes and binders I slaved at in my last week at work? All that stuff I made to minimize transition was largely ignored by my substitute. I'd like to make less work for myself, if you please, especially since no one needs all that junk to run a good group.

Doctor's appointment today. This was the best one yet - she's pleased with Blake's weight gain (even though he slipped back half a pound during his mysterious illness) and general development. She told me again about the importance of using tap water and seeing that he gets a full range of solid food, and she didn't even make a comment about the fact that he was still nursing through the night. I told her truthfully that he's not getting all that much milk in the night, as on the very few occasions I have taken "a night off," I rarely feel full in the morning. The facts he's mostly comfort sucking and has been (up until last night, at least) fairly easy to settle seem to content her, and I didn't hear anything more about water bottles in the night or any such nonsense. She also said, "you're still breastfeeding," as a statement rather than a question, which wins her points in my book.

(Amusing grandmother interlude: a few nights ago I was on the phone with Grandma to get family mailing addresses. She asked how Blake was sleeping, and when I reported that he was waking frequently but settling easily, she said, "That's to be expected. When he's eating more foods and going to bed with a full tummy, he'll sleep through."

It's funny because yesterday at lunch we were having a conversation about the detrimental effects the 'clean your plate' philosophy has had on the health of North Americans. Blake will be loads healthier than my mother because he's encouraged to listen to his body, graze when he's hungry and stop when he feels full. My mother was a bottle baby and has terrible eating habits (one of the worst in my opinion is her continued need to eat sugary sweets right before going to bed after a night shift. No, she doesn't sleep well, thanks for asking.) Anyway, it's one more example of my grandmother's tiny war on my starve-the-baby-by-breastfeeding agenda. Hee.)

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- Rocketbride's adventure of 12/17/2004 11:25:00 p.m.